In my list of 31 things about me, I failed to list that I try and exercise 6 days a week. I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to put that because it is a pretty big part of my life.
I only started exercising and taking care of my physical self about 2 years ago. I guess that’s when it occurred to me that I wanted to live a long life without being burdened by illness or worse things. I have been taking vitamins for years but I just recently (2 years) got into supplements and other such things health related. I try to eat healthy-a goal at which I fail miserably, but that’s another blog post. I do cardio 6 days a week and lift weights 4-5 of those days. It is a huge part of my day even though I only spend about 1.5 hours actually doing it. I spend most of my day mentally preparing myself for it and trying to talk myself out of talking myself out of going to the gym. Comprendé?
I think it was about a year ago I realized that I had reached the age where I felt beautiful. I’d lost weight and of course that contributed, but I’d been through weight loss in the past and never had this feeling. I think a majority of the “feeling beautiful” comes from working out. When I am working out consistently (there have been a few weeks that I didn’t do what I should have), I actually do feel better. I feel more confident. It’s like I know I am doing what I can to better myself and people can see it in how I hold myself, even if they can’t see it in my shape- I’m still overweight according to today’s standards. And I struggle daily with the LBs. But when I am working out, I feel awesome. I feel like I look awesome. That feeling goes a LONG way.
(So, when you read in a magazine article or online that people who used a certain exercise program “feel great!” then you know they aren’t actually lying just to sell the product. It is actually true. You do actually feel better when you exercise. Well, not necessarily WHILE you exercise, but when you’ve accomplished a workout.)
And it took me 30 some years to get that feeling. I always struggled with confidence. I was always the “big” girl among my friends, although, looking back now, I know I was never actually fat. I think it takes age to put perspective on many things and for me, my body looks better through my 30+ year old eyes than it ever did in my teens and 20s.
The age came before the beauty.